Too Much of a Good Thing?

Okay, I'm suffering some overwhelm here. The problem is, it's all good things. But they're good things I have responsibility for...and I may have bitten off just a little more than I can chew.

It seemed perfectly reasonable, at first. And then there was another thing. And another thing. And just one more little thing...and all I will have help with. But all take time, and energy, and prep-work. What the HELL did I just do to myself?

Maybe I'm just feeling bad because I'm tired and still in shock and pain from getting six teeth pulled at once. Maybe I just need some extra vitamin B today. But I'm not sure how sociable I can be, and I'm afraid I'm going to start snapping at people who completely don't deserve it. To break it down, this is what thing look like between October and February.

October:
Ritual planning for Samhain
Scribe's Painting Party
Taum's visit
Tea tasting
(not so bad, right?)

November:
Bunch of birthdays
Six tooth dental visit
Tea tasting
Allegra's painting party
Leading a workshop
Yule planning for Path
Week long Thanksgiving trip to see Taum

December:
Ten day trip to Cali
Yule with Path
Scribe's Christmas Party
Christmas trip to Franklin
Being Adryn's minion

January:
Being Adryn's minion
Next dentist app.
Work catchup

February:
Tea tasting
Trip to see Taum (hopefully)


Nothing individually, or even in small sections, is too much. But too many of these things are happening one right after the other, involving weeks out of my life not merely hours. Somewhere in there I am balancing two D&D games a week, Writing Club, helping organize Path of the Moon, working, buying Christmas presents with non-existent money for more people and people I don't know as well as I should, getting a passport and money to go to Japan, and oh yes, WRITING.

I love all of these things. I WANT to do all of these things. I am in heaven being of help to so many people, being a part of so many diverse communities. But I'm wondering if I need to start saying "no" again. Or just learn to keep my mouth shut. Or something. Because I'm exhausted already, and it's barely mid-November. If things keep happening like they have been, January and February are going to fill up too.

And I can't shake the feeling that I'm whining about nothing. I know busy people. Do I really count as a busy people? So much of this is fun stuff, and my house is a wreck because I'm too tired and burned out even to sleep. How can I even begin to manage my energy here, to do any real recharging in the midst of this chaos?

And the repeating message in the back of my head is "All I want is to be with the man I love right now; to lock the doors and close the blinds and tell the rest of the world to go to hell for the next two weeks."

Highly impractical. Maybe some intensive visualization? The body and mind don't really know the difference between strongly imagined things and reality. Or maybe I just need to Ho'oponopono the holy hell out of feeling overwhelmed.

But I'm too tired.

Whine. Complain.

Bah.

Someone with real problems should slap some sense into me, bitching about having too much awesome on my plate.

One Birthday Wish